5 More Work Days

It is getting closer and closer to my last day of work and although I have been longing for this day for many months, there are still some things that scare me a bit. One of my biggest concerns is that getting done work now is going to have a negative affect when I eventually want to re-enter the workforce. Fortunately, I take some solace in the fact that I am leaving a job that I never saw myself in long-term anyway. I also worry about how we will adjust to life on one income. In some ways, I think that having less money will help reduce the unnecessary amounts of stuff we seem to accrue, but I know that being tight on money will create stress, especially for my husband, and the idea of him stressed out really worries me. Plus, I have been daydreaming in my mind about how marvelous being a stay at home mom will be, but I know that there is no one ideal form of motherhood, and it will come with its own challenges.

some things I will miss: savoring a hot cup of tea or coffee without interruption, having conversations with adults, being able to financially provide for my family
some things I will enjoy: not having to try to get all the chores done on the weekends, actually having time to visit family and friends, baby girl not getting sick quite so often, and most importantly, not being away from my baby for eight and a half hours at a time day after day

I have actually been very lucky to have had such a flexible employer. I have had A LOT of time off (Holidays, Snow days, Sick days, Vacation) this past year but man those weeks when I did have to work 40 hours were incredibly brutal. I don't even want to be completely honest about how hard it is because I don't want to discourage any other moms or make anyone feel bad if their routine is working for them. So I will just say I am so completely beyond thankful that I have this opportunity! Even with the concerns I am currently harboring about how we will balance our new life, I know without a doubt this is the right choice for me, AND I am going to be floating on air on my way home from work next Thursday.

Play Dough!

I've been wanting to introduce baby girl to play dough for a while now, but I have been waiting until I felt she wouldn't try to put it in her mouth. I decided just to make my own this time, and did the basic flour, water, salt, vegetable oil recipe. It came out really great and we had a lot of fun! Of course she is still pretty young to be making any masterpieces, but it did hold her attention for a good 20 minutes. She had fun touching and exploring it. I made little balls and she flattened them and I even gave her a frosting decoration spout to poke with which she enjoyed.

As she gets older, there are so many things I want to try, and a few good list of ideas can be found at: 
http://artfulparent.com/2012/02/39-ideas-for-playing-with-playdough.html
http://www.learning4kids.net/list-of-play-dough-activities/

Words of Wisdom: Take All Advice With a Grain of Salt

I think we all know this deep down, but need to be reminded of it sometimes. Especially while feeling vulnerable navigating the sometimes tumultuous waters of parenting. Also know that when other mom's talk about what their child was like or did at a certain age, they don't remember 100%. Definitely be suspicious of anyone in the generation above you, but even after a six month time period the accuracy of what they tell you falls steeply. It's so funny how quickly you forget that which you were slightly obsessed about during the first year of your babies life.  My daughter is only 15 months old and I would definitely have to look at our baby calendar to tell you when she first rolled over or sat up, or stood without support. And lastly know that in terms of "parenting styles" its all relative. Different people have different definitions of  "attachment parenting" and "cry it out", or whatever other trendy parenting catchphrase you might have heard and even words like "always" and "never" are used more liberally by some than others.

Toys, Toys, Toys!

So, just a warning this is going to be a superfluous analysis on the subject of toys-but over thinking things is what I do best! Haha, actually no, I think toys are very important because I think play is very important, to children and adults! And since Christmas is just around the corner, I have been thinking about what to get baby girl for her "big gift" from Santa. We went pretty simple for her first birthday, a babydoll and two books, mostly because I knew that she was going to be getting a lot of toys from everyone else. But I want Christmas to be a little more extravagant (because I'm such a lover of Christmas). I think I will save her gifts for another post because she is going to be getting quite a bit.

When it comes to picking out toys I have mixed feelings. I think play is infinitely important for children's development and I generally prefer the toys that inspire open ended play. For example, blocks and play dough inspire creativity and imagination because they allow you to make anything your mind can think up, and then you get to play with it. One day you make a plane, another you make a town. It's like the toy that keeps on giving. An example of a NON open-ended toy popular this year is "Imanginarium Elmo" who literally tells you how to play with him. Oh the irony. I've read a lot of articles that bash electronic toys as completely evil because they contribute to landfills and create mindless children. Personally, I feel there is a continuum, where some like Imaginarium Elmo do, in a way, offer a prompt for kids to imagine off of (but a non talking Elmo would be better), and some are just plain old useless. For young babies, the electronic toys just seem to entertain them rather then inspire exploration. Again, I don't think these toys are poison, I just think they make a good toy for the car, when sometimes you need them to be entertained ;). To encourage the kind of play that I want my daughter to be partaking in (at least most of the time) I will be looking for the open-ended toys. The links below have been the best toy guides I have found so far and baby girl has a lot of things from these lists that have proved to be both of our favorites for play time: 

http://www.aota.org/-/media/Corporate/Files/Practice/Children/Browse/Play/Toys%20tip%20sheet.pdf
http://www.naeyc.org/toys

I will admit there are a few toys that I really, really hate. Some people say that commercialism is evil and we shouldn't get our kids anything commercialized like Disney or Sesame Street. Eh, I get it the criticism, and consumerism is definitely not one of my favorite aspects of American culture, but to be honest I don't loose sleep over it. Of course I would prefer that my child doesn't want EVERYTHING EVER related to one show/movie. The Frozen phenomenon does concern me a bit, but I don't think a seven year going through an Elsa and Anna phase can't later learn to navigate more conservatively through our consumer world. To me I guess it again comes down to the show or character and product in question. There are worse things than Elmo, or Minnie Mouse. Like Bratz and MostersHigh. Please God, please do not let her be entranced by their slutty babydollness. I'm sorry if you like them, but these toys are awful. Toys against humanity if you will. And I apologize early to any friends and family members who ever read this in the future and who might have gotten her one of the toys, but you can be sure it was promptly put in the basement never to see the light of day. If you are interested in other awful toys (in some peoples opinions) see the TOADY (Toys Oppressive And Destructive to Young Children) awards: http://www.commercialfreechildhood.org/campaign/toady-awards It is pretty interesting.

Rough Morning

So yesterday started out with a mom win-a nice, hot, independent, shower! But it went downhill from there. I forgot to start my car early so we were about 10min behind, which with traffic where I live translates into 30min behind our normal schedule. Baby girl already has been sad when I drop her off lately, but yesterday she also fell and got a rug burn under her eye right before I was going to walk out the door. Needless to say I had to stay and comfort her and then she definitely didn't want me to leave. This morning was better, but she was still sad. This has probably been the worst week so far; she has cried a bit every day. It's funny how we are sad when they don't seem to care when we are leaving and sad when they are upset when we are leaving. When I picked her up from work Wednesday she already had her boots on because she was upset and saying "mama" :( I was hoping we would get out of this stage since I'm getting done work soon but I knew we would have to go through some of it.

*12 more work days*

Breastfeeding a Toddler

So far, these have been my favorite resources for breastfeeding beyond 12 months for either information or just support:

http://kellymom.com/ages/older-infant/ebf-benefits/
http://kellymom.com/bf/normal/toddlernursing/
http://nursememama.com/2014/11/03/to-the-mom-of-a-nursing-toddler/
http://thestir.cafemom.com/toddler/116520/5_toddler_breastfeeding_myths_that

And while this article from New Beginnings is actually about weaning, I found it an encouraging account of one mom's experience breastfeeding through toddler-hood: Letting Go, A Weaning Story.

Visiting a When a New Baby Arrives

This post is really a to-do list for myself. It started out as detached thoughts in my head during my own postpartum recovery experience. Throughout my many visitors, thoughts kept popping into my head on what I wanted to remember to do when I visit a mom who has just had a new baby.

1. Wait-I know this one will be harder than it sounds, but I really think a new family needs some alone time to bond, process their birth experience, and SLEEP. Bringing a baby into the world is a completely overwhelming experience and new moms do not need any other forms of excitement. And for new moms like me, it can take up to a month before emotions really start to settle down. Sending a care package (using some of the ideas below), is a way to show that your thinking of the new family, without interfering.
2. Visits should be an hour at maximum. Good God if you are going to visit, please keep the visit short and sweet!
3. Bring a gift. Obviously, this is not a necessity but a nice gesture. Food and diapers are both great. For food think frozen dinners and easy snacks she can eat with one hand (fruit, muffins, etc.).
4. Clean up a bit. If you are close enough do the dishes or see if you can put in some laundry. Ask "what can I do for you" not "is there anything I can do for you" and make her tell you because there has got to be something!

I know that it's a very exciting time, and that visitors only want to send their love to the new family's but there are two experiences that made me want to cry anytime I thought of them until just recently. They may have been alleviated by following #2 of this list, but because I NEVER want to make anyone feel that way, I will always er on the extra sensitive side. When it comes to my family and close friends, I know I will have a discussion about visiting while she is still pregnant, and make her PROMISE her to be honest with me if she changes her mind when the joyous, yet hectic, time arrives.

Empowerng Books for Girls

I stumbled on to this list three years ago now if you can believe it. Now that I have a daughter, I'm very glad I hung on to it!

Atwood, M. (1995). Princess Prunella and the Purple Peanut. NY: Workman Publishing Company.

Banks, L. R. (1992). Farthest-Away Mountain. NY: HarperCollins.

Berenzy, A. (1995). Rapunzel. NY: Henry Holt & Company.

Chin, C. (1997). China’s Bravest Girl: The Legend of Hua Mu Lan. NY: Children’s Book Press.

Cole, B. (1997). Princess Smartypants. NY: Penguin Young Readers Group.

Huck, C. (1994). Princess Furball. NY: HarperCollins.

Kellogg, S. (1995). Sally Ann Thunder Ann Whirlwind Crockett. NY: HarperCollins.

Lansky, B. (2000). Girls to the rescue, Vol. 7. NY: Meadowbrook Press.

Lowell, S. (2000). Little red cowboy hat. NY: Henry Holt & Company.

Lowell, S. (2004). Dusty Locks and the three bears. NY: Holt, Henry Books for Young Readers.

Lurie, A. (2005). Clever Gretchen and Other Forgotten Tales. NY: IUniverse, Incorporated.

Ragan, K. (2000). Fearless girls, wise women, and beloved sisters: heroines in folktales from around 
the world. NY: Norton, W. W. & Company.

San Souci, R. (2004). The well at the end of the world. NY: Chronicle Books LLC.

Stanley, D. (2001). Saving Sweetness. NY: Penguin Young Readers Group.

Yolen, J. (2000). Not One Damsel in Distress: World Folktales for Strong Girls. NY: Harcourt.

Girls Life vs. Boys life

I know this isn't a completely fair comparison because the publisher's are entirely different entities, but it's just too perfect that the titles are "Girls Life" and "Boys Life"

Images come from http://www.girlslife.com/ and http://boyslife.org/